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Last Piece of Cheese | Next Piece of Cheese

Thanks for your good thoughts, dears...

But...

...it seems things are only worse now. They didn't keep her at the hospital, called me at 3:15pm to tell they were sending her back because "there were no medical reasons to keep her" - of course, as they didn't perform any of the exams her physician has asked for!

Her doctor won't be here before tomorrow afternoon. And what can she do? Send her to another hospital? The main one? Where they kept once Paul from 4pm to midnight in a corridor, not giving him a drop of water when his kidneys disease asks for that on a regular basis?

She needs continuous help now, the nurse will come before diner, Sophie (who comes to wash Paul) will give her her diner, and I'll go around 10:30pm to put her to bed. Praying she doesn't fall once again like yesterday night, when I was called at a quarter to midnight. And I don't know how we'll manage for the coming days. I'll have to go help her eat at noon, hurrying to be back and feed Paul.

If I could, I'd keep both Paul and Mom here, but it's absolutely impossible to create a second bedroom and a shower downstairs, and they both need to be on the groundfloor. Not mentioning they would fight all the time. Send any of them to a "retirement house"? It's beyond our means and any of them would become crazy no times. Am I going to be asked to chose between my husband and my mother?

Perhaps if I can find a guard for her at home, only we'll need one for the day, one for the night and one for the week-end... And wait 4 or 6 months to obtain some financial aid.

I'm at a lost, really. Thanks again for your support, that's so good to hear from you. You're the bests!

Later
Sophie and I helped her with her diner but it was one hour for a few spoons. Sophie gave me the name and phone of a gerontologist in the next town, I must call him first hour in the morning to ask for an urgent visit. Crossing fingers, because Mom really needs serious help.

Comments

( 13 Mouthfuls — Munch On! )
inlaterdays
28th Nov, 2007 21:08 (UTC)
That's truly awful. I can't believe that they didn't perform the tests her doctor asked for! I mean, i believe it, but - it's awful.

Is there something like hospice care there? When my then-husband's grandmother was critically ill, I would help bathe her, feed her, and change her oxygen, and the hospice people came to check up on her.

But it sounds like what your mother needs right now is to find out what's causing her to be ill. I hope that when her doctor finally comes he will MAKE them do the tests.

And I hope you're able to find out what is going on and come to a good solution. No one should be forced to choose between her husband and her mother; it's just not fair.
brigittchen
28th Nov, 2007 21:22 (UTC)
Oh Kand, I had no idea! Wish you luck, sweety!
And its absolutly awfull, how our oldies are getting threated today!
There should be nice homes, for everyone! But its a money-thing, as allways :o(
tarlanx
28th Nov, 2007 22:02 (UTC)
Oh, I wish I had some great advice for you but can only echo what inlaterdays said...can you approach a hospice for help? You really shouldn't be forced into a position where you have to choose between loved ones :-(
betagoddess
28th Nov, 2007 22:17 (UTC)
I'm so sorry that finding care for you mother is so hard! Especially since Paul needs care, too. That must be so very hard for you!

I'm sending as many positive thoughts your way as I can that you find a viable solution to the problem!

::biggest hugs::
amazonx
28th Nov, 2007 23:39 (UTC)
*hugs*
I love ya, babe, and I hope things get easier for you soon. You're a good wife and a good daughter, and they love you for it.
djinanna
29th Nov, 2007 01:53 (UTC)
*hugs*

Doctors are such a mixed bag - one is super-good, then the next three are horrid. My sympathies and good vibes for this situation.

*hugs*
ursula4x
29th Nov, 2007 02:24 (UTC)
I was able to finally hire a wonderful woman to help take care of my Mom. I hope that kind of angel comes your way.
bardsmaid
29th Nov, 2007 05:16 (UTC)
Hope everything works out for you. {{{sends hugs}}}
(Deleted comment)
ladymidath
29th Nov, 2007 12:49 (UTC)
I am so sorry to hear this, they should have performed the tests. It's terrible that they didn't. Sending you a hug and good positive thoughts. ::hugs::
griva_x
29th Nov, 2007 13:24 (UTC)
Looks like ther problems with medical stuff and them often not doing anything are universal.

/sigh/

lorelei633
29th Nov, 2007 15:39 (UTC)
*hugs you tight tight tight* I know this is a scary and stressful time. I just wish I could be there to hug you in person. I'm keeping you and your Mom and Paul in my thoughts.
kaetsa
1st Dec, 2007 19:10 (UTC)
I'm so sorry this is happening to you and your family. It sounds like you are doing everything you can and the hospitals are not. You should be able to depend on a hospital to do what they are suppose to do.

I hope your Mom's own doctor will be able to do a little better in finding the reason she is not well.

*Hugs*
( 13 Mouthfuls — Munch On! )

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